Coming up M.D.

                              Hello Doctor, thank you for seeing me.

                      Well I'm here to help.  Now what seems to be the problem?

                                    Well, my brain is a giant wiener.

                                I see.  And how long has it been this way?

                                  Well, it wasn't always this way.  I used to be normal.

   Sure, sure.  Well, just to encourage you, lots of people have giant wiener brain problems nowadays.

                                       Really?  That is encouraging!

                  And we are able to treat them with treatments that are measurable.

                            Wow!  That sounds so meaningful.

     It sure does.  Now I do have some colorful candies that I can give you for your problem.

                                             Ok, sure.  Do they work?

                           Well, like I said, they have a degree of measurable effect.

                                                 Ok.

        Now, I want to warn you that there are a of couple warnings that I need to warn you about.

                                      Ok...

        First, these candies might actually make the wiener brain even more giant more often.

                                           ...wait...i... i don't understand...

  Of course, right?  We get that a lot.  Second, they may make the wiener brain permanently irreversible.

                                          ...oh my...but-

        Also, they almost always make the wiener even bigger before they ever shrink the wiener.

               (Tears begin to flow.)

                                            ...i...i just don't think-

                    Wait, wait, let me just tell you, I have a brother who's an attorney-

                                Oh yeah?  And the candies helped him?

                                No, no, I'm just warning you not to mess with me.