The Brutal-full Bronx

                            Hi Catchit.

                             Hello Macdougal.

                                  What are you watching?

                            "Dancing with the Scarred for Life"

                                    That sounds interesting.

                                Yeah, but the judges are all wack.

          Hmm.  So listen, I'm thinking about moving into your neighborhood.

                            Oh... yeah?  Why would you do that?

Well, truthfully, I'm looking to save a little on my rent, and I read that the Bronx is cheaper than a lot of places in NYC.

             Financially... maybe, parts of it.  But there's plenty of costs otherwise.

                         What do you mean?

You pay in other ways.  It costs you your sanity, your ability to care, your ideals;  even your innermost convictions get taxed.  It's not all you've read, believe me.

               Hmm.... well, is there anything good you can say about it?

It's consistently voted the fifth happiest borough... in all of New York City.  So we got that going for us.

The Ratchet and Catchit Encyclopedia

Ratchet

Catchit

Sucky

Metcalf

Tremont

Common(wealth)

The(rapist)

Suicidal thought

Fteley

Morrison

Gleason

Uncle Nylon

Leland

Watson

Stardust

The narrator

Continued in volume 1

The Attemptress

                                   What's your superpower?

          I'm able to survive suicide attempts, no matter how many times I try.

                              Frowning

                                       That's cool.

                                Not really.  What's your superpower?

                             I never need to use a public restroom.

                                          Wow!  Wanna trade?

Garbage Makes Me Think of You

                                 Garbage makes me think of you.

                            That's sweet.  What do you mean?

Just... when I threw away that empty tube of toothpaste, the last one you ever bought.  When I threw away the old protective case for the ipod because it cracked.  The case that you bought.  When your last towel finally wore too thin and I had to throw it away.  Actually I buried your son in that.  So basically, just... garbage.  Garbage makes me think of you.  

                                           Hmm

Single, Sexy, Suicidal

                   Do you know what a persecution complex is?

                    Why?  Are you saying I have a persecution complex?!

That's Why Erasers Have Pencils

                          Hey, what are you watching?

                                "Jon and Kate Plus A.I.D.S."

                        That sounds depressing.

                           I guess so.  I've got nothing else to do.

                                    Still out of work?

              Yeah, sick of checking the classifieds everyday.  Depressing.

                    You know, in my last film I played someone with depression.

                                Really.

Yep.  Depressed people who watched the film said my performance was very authentic.  They said I really captured the essence of depression and brought it to life on the big screen.

                                          That's great.

                                                 Thanks.

                               In my last film I played a blind person.

                                              You did?

                       Yeah.  Blind people who saw my performance said I sucked.