Hello, Suicide Hotline...
Oh hello, my name is Catchit and I'm about to commit suicide.
Okay, thank you for calling. Let me just get a pen.
Okay.
Okay, now is this going to be your first suicide attempt?
Uh, yeah, I think so.
Okay, well right now we're looking for someone with more experience.
Oh.
But let me take your name anyway, and if something changes, hey, you never know, right?
Right. Thank you.
What was your name again?
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