Ratchet and Catchit

Friday, January 16, 2015

Buzzzzz

So what do you want to do for your birthday?

Commit suicide

Are you answering me or telling me to?

Is there a difference?

Buzzzzz

Hi, what's wrong with you?

I have breast cancer.

Oh. Well, you should snap out of it.

Hi, what's wrong with you?

I have AIDS.

Oh. Well, you should snap out of it.

Hi, what's wrong with you?

I have diabetes.

Oh. Well, you should snap out of it.

Hi, what's wrong with you?

I have spinal meningitis.

Oh. Well, you should snap out of it.

Hi, what's wrong with you?

I have depression.

Oh really? Have you seen a doctor?

How are you doing?

Fine

"Happy wife, Happy life."

That's true.

"Unhappy wife, unhappy life."

That must be true too.

"Lost wife, lost life."

Is that the vade mecum?

If you commit suicide you should really update your status.

People who shoot themselves go out with a bang.