Blue Ejaculation: Why is my ejaculation blue?

                               Who'd you vote for?

                                          The red guy...

                                       Red is the color of anger.

                            I guess....   Who'd you vote for?

                                          The blue guy.

                              Blue is the color of sadness.

                                              So it is.

                                 I never knew you voted that way.

                                Well, I was always pro-choice.

                          Really?  Even with your faith and beliefs?

Yeah.  You know, I always wish my mother wouldn't have had me in the first place.  People always say that adoption is the better choice than abortion.  But I disagree.  Adoption prolonged me to a life of cruelty and suffering.

I wish I had something to say.  I'm sure I can't convince you.  I'm sorry for your suffering.  But you know that I believe that my life is immeasurably better having known you... having loved you and been loved by you.

Well, your beliefs are your beliefs.  But you know I always said you were delusional.

Thanks... still... I still think pain...

                           Hey guys!  Check out my sweet new tattoo!

                 (tattoo)

                             See, and then you got people like him.

                   I want to commit suicide too.  Did I tell you that?

Slowly returning to normal

                                            The trains are running again.

Do not pass go kill yourself

I look at the present from the past as if it were the future.

                             So you

                                          are living

                                             in the past...

                                      It would seem.

                        That's not good.  You're not going to make it very far.

                              Who are you again?

                                       Don't remember.

       Neither do I.  Do I?  Wait, I think I know you.  You're my memories of her.

                                    "Stardust"

But you're not very clear.  You're growing dim.  Covered in dust...  Does anyone care that I'm losing her forever?  That she'll never be back!  She's gone and no one cares.

                                  You care.

But I can't do anything about it.  I tried to write it all down after she was gone, but my brain won't work.  My brain won't work anymore.

                        She was brain dead... and you?

Uncontrollable weeping.  Painridden.  Unconsolable.  

There's no hope.  Why am I having a conversation with the faded memories of my suicide-

                                       Of her.

                                   You have a better chance

                                       Of saving her

                              If there's more than one

                                      of you, of you, of you.

                                           I hate myselves.

Being Thoughtful

       (At the Hallmark in Parkchester)

                   I'm looking for a card that says "thinking of you."

                                     Sure, no problem.

                                 "On your anniversary"

                                      Yep, we can do that.

                           "Anniversary of your bereavement"

                               Ok, let me see.

                               "Of your spouse's suicide."

                                     Umm

"When he abandoned you and the kids and changed your life forever deeply scarring you and leaving you to pick up the pieces and put back together what little life you can eek out as you try to go on alone but you'll never be the same"

                                      Maybe aisle five?

                                 But do you have the Jewish version?

Trick or Tragedy?

                 What are you gonna be for Halloween this year?

                             A suicide victim.

                              That's not very imaginative.

            Well, the last few years I've been going as a suicide survivor.

                     I think you should go as a sexy pirate.

                        You know, with the mustache and everything...

Iphone 5S uicide

                    It was so difficult hearing about your wife's suicide.

                                       Thanks I guess.

                            It was just really, really frustrating.

                               What are you talking about?

                     Just the connection on this stupid phone made everything so jumpy.

                                          ...

                                     I'd almost rather have an e-reader.